I love French

Setting aside my issues with gendered nouns and adjectives and the use of the male plural to describe a group of mixed genders, I really love French.

Why, do you ask?

My French composition course this week had a lesson about l’injustice dans la société [injustices in society]. I have an essay about injustices due this weekend (note: writing essays in another language is really difficult. Thus, I procrastinate until the last second).

On the list of vocabulaire utile [useful vocabulary] provided by my professor is the following:

le sexisme (un[e] phallocrate)

That’s right, the French word for someone who is a “male chauvinist (pig),” or has sexisme [sexism], is un phallocrate.

I knew I picked the right language to study. Expect later posts referencing phallocrats.

Meme Time: the Fuck-t List

Wonderful Kate Harding of Shapely Prose has stumbled upon a great meme: the Fuck-t List. Because I wholeheartedly support delineating and rejecting asinine cultural rituals, here’s my non-exhaustive list of things I have no desire to do before I die that many people seem to think are awesome:

• Marry a Nice Guy and have a white wedding
• Try illicit drugs specifically for Cool Points^TM
• Participate in any sort of marathon-type activity
• Get Botox or plastic surgery
• Climb any terrain not suited for aforementioned activity, such as Mt. Everest
• Attend church regularly and/or “find God”
• Dye, straighten, meticulously style, or use more than two products on my hair
• Be considered up-to-date on all the trendiest fashions
• Purchase a purse, jeans, or shirt costing more than $100
• Wear heels high and uncomfortable enough to be “sexy”
• Ride, own, or interact in any fashion with a horse
• Diet
• Age gracefully
• Wear a bikini
• Wear a thong or any lingerie with a purely decorative purpose
• Keep my cat off furniture
• Wear anything shorter than my mid-thigh
• Please people who are actually assholes, no matter how important they are
• Wax, pluck, or shave my pubic hair
• Give up meat, coffee, fat, butter, or dessert
• Read “classics” that everyone thinks are impressive but actually suck
• Pretend that I don’t think that the “meat and potato” white male navel-gazing philosophers I have to read eight times aren’t  full of shit
• Own a brand new car, or any sort of SUV
• Really care about professional sports
• Develop a “wine pallet”
• Get really organized
• Fake an orgasm
• Have washboard abs
• Wear makeup on a daily basis
• Have a torrid affair with patriarchal dominant/submissive undertones
• Listen to NPR for more than 5 minutes without being filled with RAGE
• Apologize for my high moral standards, education and/or intelligence
• Get over my escalator phobia
• Become so wealthy I could hire someone to walk my dog
• Wear tiny pants. Fuck no.
• Wake up early for repetitive exercise
• Purposely seek to tan my white ass by either artificial or natural means

So my small but fantastic audience, what things  would you include on your Fuck-t List?